A nightmare that'll have you sweating and shivering. Quite possibly the worst experience you'll ever have. I am of course referring to compiling your wedding guest list. Mind boggling, headache inducing, row causing... guest lists have been the death of more than one relationship before now. Make sure yours is not the next casualty by following these basic tips:
When deciding who to invite to your big day, start with yourselves and who MUST be there and work out. So many people I see start by panicking about the tangent relatives and former colleagues in far flung places. There's the bride and the groom; that's two guests down already. Your attendants must come next. Then your parents: that's another 4. Any siblings and other close family next, e.g. grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins. Then go to closest friends, token family (i.e. godparents, step family etc). Having gone through all of these, if you have any space left over you can start thinking about work colleagues, distant family and neighbours.
Your venue will dictate exactly how many people can be accomodated. If you're holding your venue and sit-down reception in the same venue, find out the capacities of the ceremony room and the reception room. If there is a discrepancy between the two, go with the smaller figure for your guestlist. (As per previous blog entry, it is the epitome of bad manners to invite someone to the ceremony and not invite them to the sit down reception.) Trust me, erring on the side of smaller numbers not only cuts costs, but it also makes putting your guest list together much simpler. If you're worried about cutting some people out, no one is unlikely to be cross with the line "The venue is strictly limited as to the number of people we can invite."
My most important rule is that your wedding is YOUR day, yours and your husband-to-be's. No one else's. If anybody makes that bigger a fuss about who should be there and not, they don't love you enough to care about what is really going to make you happy. And frankly, their invite is the first one that can go in the bin!
From author's private collection
When deciding who to invite to your big day, start with yourselves and who MUST be there and work out. So many people I see start by panicking about the tangent relatives and former colleagues in far flung places. There's the bride and the groom; that's two guests down already. Your attendants must come next. Then your parents: that's another 4. Any siblings and other close family next, e.g. grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins. Then go to closest friends, token family (i.e. godparents, step family etc). Having gone through all of these, if you have any space left over you can start thinking about work colleagues, distant family and neighbours.
From author's private collection
Your venue will dictate exactly how many people can be accomodated. If you're holding your venue and sit-down reception in the same venue, find out the capacities of the ceremony room and the reception room. If there is a discrepancy between the two, go with the smaller figure for your guestlist. (As per previous blog entry, it is the epitome of bad manners to invite someone to the ceremony and not invite them to the sit down reception.) Trust me, erring on the side of smaller numbers not only cuts costs, but it also makes putting your guest list together much simpler. If you're worried about cutting some people out, no one is unlikely to be cross with the line "The venue is strictly limited as to the number of people we can invite."
Author's own
My most important rule is that your wedding is YOUR day, yours and your husband-to-be's. No one else's. If anybody makes that bigger a fuss about who should be there and not, they don't love you enough to care about what is really going to make you happy. And frankly, their invite is the first one that can go in the bin!
From author's private collection
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