Monday, 10 October 2011

Marriage and Motherhood: what's it like being pregnant on your big day?

It's the ultimate sign of commitment between a couple; a day you'll remember for the rest of your lives...  But what are we talking about here?  Getting married or having a baby?

I recently asked a friend of mine what she thought about a bride being pregnant on her weddding day.  "Well," she said.  "If you can see the bump yet, then I guess it's kinda cute.  I mean, it's like a secret between the bride and the groom.  It's the ultimate commitment.  But if she's showing then it just looks desperate."  So, according to my friend, on that basis Lily Allen was cute but Alicia Keys was desperate.

Having kids before marriage, or even without it entirely, is no longer the taboo it once was TF4T.  If anything there seems to be a complete reversal in that couples now want to procreate and have their children participate actively in their wedding.  Take Victoria and David Beckham: notorious for being extremely protective of their children's privacy, they took great pains to include their son Brooklyn in their wedding photos (covered exclusively by OK! magazine) because they didn't want him asking in later years, 'Where was I at your wedding?'

Perhaps I take a far too practical view of these things, but I think it would simply be too much.  When you're pregnant, your energy levels are lower, your hair and nails are devoid of their normal nutrients and feeling like you want to throw up on your wedding can't be a good thing.  I understand why couples feel the need to be married before their child arrives - legally, it makes things a heck of a lot more simple! - but organising a wedding is a full time occupation.  It's hectic enough to organise without having to plan for a baby as well.  My advice: marry before the baby comes if you wish, but please, leave the big wedding celebration til later.  That way the newest member of your family can also be a part of it.

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